By Bo Sanchez

When I was single, I did everything with lightning speed. I remember it took me only nine minutes to eat breakfast, shower, dress-up and get ready to drive off to wherever. No kidding. When I got married preparing to leave home takes me a little bit more time. (About one hour and fifty-one minutes more.)

Don’t get me wrong. I am not complaining. You see, my wife is a woman. (Thank God.) If I wanted to continue my quick pace in life, I should have remained single. Or married another guy, which would look strange especially that I am a preacher.

You see, I am a typical male that’s totally goal-fixated. Men are creatures of purpose while women are creatures of process. Let me explain it another way: As a man, I don’t care much for the journey – just the destination. So the shorter the trip the better. My wife, however, loves every inch of the journey. She walks leisurely, hums a tune, pauses for scenery.

That’s why each morning she enjoys a cool shower while I just try to get moist. And that’s why she treats as near-sacred her time in front of an open closet, choosing and re-choosing what clothes to wear. I, however, just grab what I wore yesterday. But more importantly this is the reason why my wife majors in relationships. And I don’t think much about them. Because relationships don’t have purposes, the relationship is the purpose.

Like if I sprint out of the house while stuffing breakfast in my mouth, my wife takes delight in a slow meal where food isn’t the only thing shared, but conversation, stories, warmth and laughter. She also has the time to regularly stop her work to check on the state of our friendship, she asks, “Do you love me?” When I respond, “Yes, I do”, she teases “How much?” After I tell her, “Very much,” she peacefully goes back to whatever she was doing. This dialogue is repeated about fourteen times in a regular day. Because of her, I learned anew an ancient truth: That friendships are the most sacred, most precious, most life-giving stuff of human life. They are our richest treasure!

My friends are many. God is my first Friend. I consider my wife to be my best friend. And I have my family and my community as wonderful and beautiful friends. As I waste my time with them and wonder whether I am accomplishing anything, I have to hammer this reality to my head: Friendships are not about goals or purposes or results. Because friendship in essence is the journey and the destination. I have now learned that relationships are more important accomplishments.

That time-efficiency is second only to love-efficiency. That nurturing friendship is the greatest thing that I can ever accomplish in life. In essence that’s my purpose for being. (Male thinking, hmmm?)

Salamat sa You can make your life Beautiful