By: Fr. Rudy Fernandez, SJ

Fr. Rudy Fernandez is the first Society of Jesus (SJ) Pinoy missionary in Japan. He came to Japan in 1955. He was ordained after theological studies in Tokyo in 1962. He is presently teaching English and religion at the Jesuit high school in Hiroshima, Hiroshima Gakuin. One of his missions is advising and marrying young people in love.

Kyoko
Kyoko spent her junior and senior high school years- from twelve to eighteen- in Hiroshima jogakuin, a Protestant girl’s school in the city. She became acquainted with the Bible and Christian hymns and came to love them there. She was not a Christian herself, but that did not make her a rarity. Most of her fellow students were not Christian either. Buddhist and indifferent, mostly; typical of the student population of most Christian schools in Japan, more popularly known as mission schools. During those six she came to me with her friend Yukiko once a week to learn practical, conversational English.

Back Home
After graduating from jogakuin, she studied piano at the Toho College of Music in Tokyo. After she finished her course there, she came home to Hiroshima and teaches at Hijiyama Girl’s School and at a Yamaha Music classroom. She also teaches private piano lesson at home. She came again weekly for English with me.

Blind Date
Her younger sister got married. In traditional Japan the older always goes foist, but Kyoko was hardly giving marriage a thought. Suddenly one day, however, she told me she was having a “miai”- a date arranged by a third party, with the prospect of marriage between the dating partners.

Getting Married
The date was successful. Kyoko and her date, Kazuhiko, found themselves compatible. They dated more to get to know each other better. After a couple of months she came to me with all smiles telling me Kazuhiko had proposed and they were getting married. That was in December, 1991 and the weeding would be  in March, 1992.

Marriage
Marriages are expensive affairs in Japan, very expensive. The weeding ceremony and the weeding banquet, with the latter taking most of lime light, are usually a package deal at some bid hotel.

Christian Wedding
A couple of weeks before the wedding day Kyoko came with a very worried look on her face. She hesitantly asked if she could asked a favor of me She and her fiancé had just been to the hotel where the wedding was to take place to see just where and how the ceremony would be held. When shown the room and told the ritual, she almost burst into tears. How could she get married with out the bible and hymns and chapel atmospheres featuring in the ceremony? Her fiancé knew little about Christianity but understood and respected her feelings. The favor she wanted to asked was: could they have the wedding in our chapel with a Christian ceremony even though they were not Christian and were not connected with the school? As far as the connections were concerned, I said our friendship is enough was connection enough, As for the ceremony in the chapel, I said, first you and Kazuhiko and I will have to have a good talked about the Christian ideal of marriage and  the Christian concept of life and love.

Words on Love
And so it was that on March 20, 1992, Kyoko and Kazuhiko were married in our chapel. Kyoko’s jogakuin classmates played the organ and sang the hymns endeared to them in their teens. She chose Paul’s words on love in I Corinthians for the reading, and on hat I preached the homily.

Yoko
Yoko was one of my students at the City Youth Center, where I teach English to working young people. She came to class on her big motorcycle almost always in jeans. One day after class I asked her why she called me “Shimpusama” (meaning Father) when all her classmates called me “Sensei” (meaning Teacher). She told me she finished her junior high school at Notre Dame Girls’ School and had heard me give a talk there. At the end of junior high, however, she decided  that the Sister strict regimen and he kind of high life she wanted to live did not jibe, so she transferred to another school. Her parents were not happy over it. She had a job as an interior decorator now. She had always liked English in school, and she was thinking of going abroad, so she was enrolled in my evening classes. That was in 1989.

Going Abroad to Work
At the end of the one year course she went to work in Tokyo. We kept in touch by mail. After a year she decided to go on to the states to study. She came back to Hiroshima to bid her family and friends goodbye. We had a long talk. She was an adventurous spirit. She had always been special to me. Where most young people were just toeing the line, she was non-conformist. While to flit thoughtlessly through life, she seemed to be searching for something. I kidded her saying you’ll find your Prince Charming over there and you may not be coming. She looked at me seriously and said almost sternly: I’m coming back because you are going to be at the altar for my wedding!

A Prophet
I turned out t o be a prophet. She met a young man named Jan in California. Their interest in each other become serious. He proposed marriage. She said she had one condition: the wedding should be in Hiroshima and her friend Fr. Fernandez would officiate at the ceremony. Jan loved her more than enough to argue.

Against Inter Racial Marriage
But there was a big obstacle. Her parents were against and inter racial marriage. Non-conformist though she was. Yoko did not want to venture into marriage with out the blessing of her parents. She phoned me long distance to tell me she was coming back as soon as she could and asked me to talk to her parents and correspond with Jan in the meanwhile.

Won her Parents Consent
I talked with her parents. Yoko came back. There was a family meeting. With her sister and brother supporting her, she won her parents consent. Then Jan came to Hiroshima. He won over all the family over with his quit and reserve and consideration. Jan is not a member of any Church denomination, but he was taught me more about the will and providence of God than I have ever taught anyone about that.

Genesis Story of Creation
And so it was word I officiated at her wedding, which took place in our chapel on September, 1991. For the reading at ceremony Yoko chose the Genesis story of creation. In her own simple way she said: marriage is just one chapter in the bigger story of creation; and God did not create Americans or Japanese. He created human beings female and male in God’s image and likeness. I borrowed her exegesis for my homily. There were two non-Japanese at the wedding: the groom and the priest

Keep Coming Back
Kyoko and Yoko’s cases are not rare. While the number of baptisms proceeds slowly, the main missionary work of sowing the seeds of the gospel goes on space. Many former students f mission school come back and ask for a Christian ceremony and blessing when the time comes for them to make the most important decision of their young lives. Invariably they drawn and touched by the Christian wording of the marriage vows. Christian or not, but with a Christian background, deeply in love, “for better or for worse” is better for them. And so they come back. Or is it, come home?